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​Relational Power

In Theory and Practice
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​C. Robert (Bob) Mesle and Jay McDaniel
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Photo by Alena Darmel: https://www.pexels.com/photo/grandfather-and-granddaughter-playing-the-piano-7322017/

​A More Relational World

​A world that is more "relational" would be more compassionate, more exciting, more creative, and more fun than the world we live in. It would be better, much better, for those who are now marginalized, victimized, brutalized, and ostracized. It would be better for other animals and the Earth, giving them the respect they deserve as fellow creatures on a small but gorgeous planet. And it would be wiser because its human inhabitants would be more in touch with the interconnectedness of things and with the intrinsic value of life. They - we - would be attuned to the way things truly are.

If we humans are to fulfill our potential and avoid further destroying one another and the planet, we must commit ourselves to a more relational future. Or, to be more precise, to a future where people value relational power over unilateral power. There would still be pain, disease, and loss in such a world. It would not be utopia. But there would be much less violence and more joy. There might still be unilateral power, but it would be disparaged not adored. The truly powerful people would be known for their relationality, not their unilaterality. 

Uniliteral power is unhealthy. Mesle gives the example of sports and military power and writes:

All of these kinds of examples point to power as the ability to affect others without being affected by them.  In the language of sports or the military, unilateral power includes both offense (scoring, defeating, even destroying the opposition) and defense (preventing the opposition from scoring, winning, or destroying us). Unilateral power flows downward—moving the burdens of life from top to bottom of the power hierarchy, with few at the top and many at the bottom.

Relational power, by contrast, is not about a power hierarchy, with few at the top and many at the bottom. It is about a kind of togetherness, a kind of love, without great gaps between "bottom" and "top." It is an aspirational ideal with many embodiments and approximations in daily life.

The exploration of "relational power" within the framework of process-relational philosophy offers a rich array of applications across various aspects of life. This exploration is crucial, as it moves the discussion from abstract philosophical concepts to concrete practices that can transform individuals and societies. This page is a "potpourri" of sections devoted to applying the idea of relational power in life. Our hope is that people around the world who are interested might take some of these ideas and develop them in their own unique directions, and that scholars might undertake further research on particular areas where "relational power" can be applied.

​What is most clear to us is that relational power is immensely relevant in interpersonal relations and family life. Our hope is that it might also be relevant to business practices, community development, international relations, sustainable agriculture, the humane treatment of animals, and global diplomacy. We also hope, indeed we yearn, for political leaders who take relational power, not unilateral power, as the aspirational ideal they offer the world, who put relational power into practice by wise public policies, and who exemplify relational power in the very spirit they offer the world.

- Jay McDaniel and Bob Mesle

Potential Areas of Application
​of Relational Power

Process-relational philosophies place a strong emphasis on "relational power" as a cornerstone for flourishing of life. These philosophies argue that all entities in the universe are interrelated and interdependent, suggesting that the well-being of each is intrinsically connected to the well-being of others. In human life, explains Bob Mesle in Three Dimensions of Relational Power, relational power includes active, intentional openness to others, a self-creative response whereby what is received from others is integrated into one's own life, and an impulse to sustain mutually enhancing relationships. Here’s how relational power, through the lens of process-relational thinking, can be actualized in different spheres of life:

Interpersonal Relationships: In personal interactions, relational power is exercised through empathy, active listening, and mutual respect. It fosters deeper connections and understanding, allowing relationships to be sources of strength and growth.

Workplace Dynamics: In the workplace, it promotes a culture of collaboration, where leadership is about empowering others, valuing diverse perspectives, and creating environments where everyone can thrive. It challenges hierarchical structures, advocating for more democratic and inclusive decision-making processes.

Community Engagement: Communities that embrace relational power prioritize collective well-being, shared responsibilities, and active participation in civic life. They work towards inclusive solutions that respect the needs and contributions of all members.

Education: Educational systems grounded in relational power focus on nurturing holistic development, critical thinking, and the co-creation of knowledge. They emphasize the importance of learning in relationship—with peers, teachers, and the environment.

Conflict Resolution: Relational power in conflict resolution involves recognizing the interconnectedness of all parties, seeking solutions that address the needs and concerns of everyone involved, and healing relationships to prevent future conflicts.
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Political Engagement: This approach to politics involves policymaking that is participatory, transparent, and accountable, with a focus on the common good. It encourages active citizenship and governance structures that are responsive to the needs of all, especially the most vulnerable.

Parenting and Family Life: Relational power in family life is about fostering an environment of mutual care, respect, and open communication. It supports the growth and development of each family member within a nurturing and supportive context.

Healthcare: In healthcare settings, relational power translates into patient-centered care, holistic approaches to health, and systems that are responsive to the needs of diverse populations. It emphasizes the healing potential of empathetic relationships between caregivers and patients.

Environmental Activism: Exercising relational power with regard to the environment means recognizing humans as part of the Earth's ecosystem, advocating for sustainable practices, and working towards ecological justice and the preservation of biodiversity.

Global Diplomacy: On the international stage, relational power involves cooperative strategies, mutual respect among nations, and efforts to address global challenges through dialogue and collective action rather than competition and conflict.

Process-relational philosophies suggest that by recognizing and nurturing these interconnections, relational power can transform individual lives, communities, and societies, leading to a more just, sustainable, and flourishing world. This transformation requires a shift from viewing power as domination over others to seeing it as a potential for collaboration and mutual enrichment.

Some ​Core Ideas
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Interconnectedness: Relational power emphasizes the interconnected nature of human relationships and recognizes that power dynamics exist within these relationships.

Mutuality: Unlike traditional power structures that rely on dominance and control, relational power emphasizes mutual respect, cooperation, and collaboration.

Empowerment: Relational power seeks to empower all individuals involved by fostering an environment where each person's voice is valued and heard.

Contextual Understanding: Recognizing that power dynamics vary depending on the context, relational power encourages a nuanced understanding of power relations in different situations,

Transformative Potential: By prioritizing dialogue, empathy, and understanding, relational power has the potential to transform conflicts and foster positive change within communities and organizations,

Ethical Considerations: Relational power encourages ethical reflection on the use of power, emphasizing the importance of fairness, justice, and inclusivity.

Accountability: Those who wield power within relational frameworks are accountable to others, ensuring that decisions and actions are transparent and aligned with shared values.

Intersectionality: Relational power acknowledges the intersections of various social identities (such as race, gender, class, etc.) and considers how these intersecting factors shape power dynamics.

Learning and Growth: Relational power fosters a culture of continuous learning and growth, where individuals can challenge their own biases and assumptions, and evolve towards more equitable relationships.

Resilience: Building resilient communities and organizations is a key aspect of relational power, as it enables individuals to navigate challenges and conflicts together, strengthening bonds and fostering collective agency.

Three Dimensions of Relational Power
Openness, Creativity, and Mutuality
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ACTIVE, INTENTIONAL, OPENNESS:  Children are wonderful examples of this aspect of relational power.  They constantly explore the world with all five senses, literally stuffing the world into their mouths to learn more about it.  Even we adults must engage in such openness just to survive and enjoy.  And we value those with greater strength in openness.  Stronger students are precisely those most gifted at, and actively committed to, openness to new information, ideas, and visions.  Artists are more open to the colors and shapes of the world, while poets are alert to the nuances of language.  Musicians hear music all around us.  Rather than “picky eaters,” we admire people who can sit at any table and learn to enjoy the amazing array of flavors the world has to offer—in food, ideas, beauty, nature, language, people, and more. The best parents are those most sensitive and responsive to the changing feelings, hopes, fears, and dreams of their children.  This fits the old saying that we should walk a mile in another person’s moccasins to learn who they are.  

SELF-CREATIVITY:  Relational power involves taking all that active openness and responding to it self-creatively.  We are not just putty in the hands of the world.  Relationally powerful people don’t just believe what we are told, or think as we are directed.  Rather, we take in the new and thoughtfully integrate it with what we already have and value.  We use our existing values and knowledge to sort out what we consider truer and better.  But creative transformation demands that we sometimes recognize new truths and values as better than our old ones, requiring us to rethink, reconceive, revalue, and even reconstruct ourselves, our visions, and our actions in response to creativity.  Walking a mile in the other person’s moccasins gives us a chance to integrate their wisdom with our own, and see the world through their eyes—but without giving up our own wisdom or eyes.  Active openness and self-creativity make it possible to see something creatively new.    

THE STRENGTH TO SUSTAIN MUTUAL RELATIONSHIPS: Relational power involves the willingness and insight to take in the new and then return to the world and our relationships with more openness, better questions, more sensitivity, and new understanding.  It means being willing and able to go back and learn more, to sustain engagement with ideas, experiences, and people, especially when those relations are challenging in some way.  It is so easy to avoid growth and change, to dodge conflict, to resist the new.  This step leads right back to the start in a spiral.  We try to become more actively and intentionally open, and more self-creative. Having walked a mile in another person’s moccasins, we are in a better position to enter creative dialogue with them, and walk further with them.  

Process philosophers know that this kind of power is not absolute. They  we -  know that there are situations where others cannot be trusted. Life can be dangerous. Still, relational power has a beauty, goodness, and effectiveness that is absent in brute force and domination. And, as noted above, it need not be a single act but a way of living, a commitment and a lifestyle, aimed at sustaining mutual relationships. Whereas unilateral power has winners and losers, relational power seeks win-win situations where all parties involved.

- Bob Mesle

Relational Power and Ecology

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The concept of relational power extends far beyond the confines of human-to-human interaction, reaching into the very core of our interactions with the Earth and its non-human inhabitants. This perspective encourages a paradigm shift, urging us to see the Earth not merely as a resource to be exploited, but as a living entity with which we can engage in a dynamic and reciprocal relationship. Similarly, our interactions with animals are reimagined, recognizing them as fellow beings with intrinsic value, capable of teaching us and enriching our lives in profound ways.

In practicing relational power with the Earth, we approach our planet with humility and openness, ready to listen to its subtle cues and learn from its complex ecosystems. This means observing the rhythms of nature, understanding the limits of natural resources, and recognizing the impact of our actions on the environment. It's about seeing ourselves as part of a larger whole, where each action we take can either contribute to the Earth's wellbeing or detract from it. The power here lies in collaboration, not domination; it's about nurturing a relationship that sustains not just human life, but all life.

Engaging with animals through the lens of relational power similarly transforms our interactions into opportunities for mutual respect and learning. Animals, as kindred creatures of the Earth, offer unique insights into the world around us. They teach us about empathy, adaptability, and the interconnectedness of all living things. By internalizing these lessons, we not only enrich our own lives but also contribute to a more harmonious coexistence with the natural world.

This reciprocal dynamic requires us to internalize influences from the Earth and animals, letting these interactions shape our understanding and actions. It's a process of continual learning and adjustment, where the goal is not to exert control but to foster a relationship based on mutual respect and benefit.

Giving back, in this context, means acting in ways that preserve and enhance the integrity of the Earth and the well-being of its creatures. It can take many forms, from conservation efforts and sustainable living practices to advocacy for animal rights and the protection of natural habitats. By giving back, we acknowledge our indebtedness to the Earth and its inhabitants, fulfilling our part in the cycle of giving and receiving that characterizes relational power.

Health Benefits 
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Relational power, often understood within the context of social and interpersonal relationships, can have several health benefits. This concept revolves around the influence and impact one has within their relationships and social networks. It's distinct from coercive or hierarchical power, focusing instead on the ability to collaborate, influence positively, and maintain healthy, supportive connections with others. Here are some health benefits associated with having relational power:
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Improved Mental Health: Strong, positive relationships and the sense of influence within these can significantly reduce stress, anxiety, and depression. Feeling valued and understood in interpersonal connections contributes to a sense of belonging and self-worth, key components in mental health.

Stress Reduction: The support systems built through relational power can act as buffers against life's stresses. Knowing you have people you can rely on, who value your opinion and welfare, can mitigate the physiological and psychological impacts of stress

Enhanced Emotional Support: With relational power comes the ability to both offer and receive emotional support. This exchange promotes emotional resilience, helping individuals navigate challenges more effectively.

Better Physical Health: There's a well-documented link between strong social ties and physical health outcomes. People with healthy relationships and a sense of influence within those relationships tend to have lower risks of chronic diseases, such as cardiovascular disease, and may even live longer.

Increased Self-Efficacy: Relational power boosts confidence in one's ability to influence outcomes and achieve goals. This sense of self-efficacy can encourage healthier lifestyle choices, such as regular exercise and a balanced diet.

Healthier Lifestyle Choices: People with strong social networks and relational power often influence each other in positive ways, including adopting healthier behaviors. This could range from quitting smoking to engaging in regular physical activity.

Improved Cognitive Functioning: There's evidence to suggest that active engagement in social relationships and the exercise of relational power can contribute to better cognitive health, potentially reducing the risk of cognitive decline and dementia in older age.

Enhanced Recovery: Whether recovering from surgery, illness, or addiction, the support from a strong social network can significantly impact the speed and success of recovery. The encouragement and accountability provided by these relationships can make a crucial difference.

Business Practices and
​ Relational Power

​If business practices were guided by relational power, there would likely be a significant shift in how organizations operate and interact with various stakeholders. Here's how business practices might be influenced:

Focus on Collaboration: Rather than a top-down approach, businesses would emphasize collaboration and cooperation among all stakeholders, including employees, customers, suppliers, and the local community. Decision-making processes would involve input from multiple parties, fostering a sense of ownership and commitment.

Emphasis on Trust and Transparency: Trust would be a cornerstone of business relationships. Companies would prioritize transparency in their operations, openly sharing information about their practices, performance, and impacts. This transparency would help build trust among stakeholders and enhance accountability.

Long-Term Relationships: Instead of short-term profit maximization, businesses would prioritize building long-term relationships with stakeholders. This would involve investing in the well-being and growth of employees, maintaining loyal customer relationships, and partnering with suppliers and communities for mutual benefit over time.

Empowerment and Inclusion: Relational power would entail empowering all stakeholders to participate in decision-making processes and contribute their perspectives. Businesses would strive to create inclusive environments where diverse voices are heard and respected, leading to innovation and better problem-solving.

Social and Environmental Responsibility: Relational power would encourage businesses to consider the broader impact of their actions on society and the environment. Companies would integrate social and environmental responsibility into their core values and operations, working towards sustainability and positive societal outcomes.

Conflict Resolution through Dialogue: When conflicts arise, businesses would prioritize dialogue and negotiation to resolve issues collaboratively. Rather than resorting to hierarchical authority or legal measures, stakeholders would engage in constructive conversations to find mutually acceptable solutions.

Customer-Centric Approach: Relational power would underscore the importance of understanding and meeting the needs of customers in a respectful and empathetic manner. Businesses would prioritize building strong relationships with customers, striving to exceed their expectations and earn their loyalty.

Employee Well-Being and Development: Companies would prioritize the well-being and development of their employees, recognizing them as valuable stakeholders. This could involve providing opportunities for skill development, promoting work-life balance, and fostering a supportive work culture.

​Community Engagement and Investment: Businesses would actively engage with the communities in which they operate, seeking to understand local needs and concerns. They would invest in community development initiatives and contribute positively to the social fabric of the areas where they do business.

Continuous Learning and Adaptation: Relational power would encourage businesses to adopt a mindset of continuous learning and adaptation. Companies would remain open to feedback from stakeholders and be willing to evolve their practices in response to changing circumstances and emerging challenges.
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Overall, embracing relational power in business practices would lead to more sustainable, inclusive, and ethical approaches to commerce, fostering stronger relationships and better outcomes for all stakeholders involved.

- ChatGPT as guided by Jay McDaniel

Cosmic Context
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​The concept of relational power, especially within the context of process-relational philosophy, extends its relevance far beyond human interactions and societal structures, touching upon the very fabric of the cosmos itself. 

Interconnectedness of All Things

At the heart of process-relational thought is the notion that nothing exists in isolation; instead, everything is in relation to everything else. This interconnectedness speaks to a cosmic relational power where every entity, from the smallest particle to the largest galaxy, is part of a vast, interdependent network. The relationships among these entities are not merely external but define their very essence.

Influence Across Scales

Relational power in the cosmos manifests through the influence entities exert on one another across different scales. This includes gravitational forces between celestial bodies, the exchange of energy in ecosystems, and the atomic forces within matter. These influences exemplify how relational power operates on a cosmic scale, shaping the evolution and behavior of the universe.

Process and Change

Process-relational philosophy views reality as a series of processes rather than static objects. This perspective aligns with modern physics, where the universe is seen as a dynamic, ever-changing reality. Relational power is key to understanding these processes, as it is the relationships between entities that drive change and development throughout the cosmos.

Emergence and Complexity

The universe is characterized by increasing complexity and the emergence of new forms of matter and life. This complexity can be attributed to relational power, as new properties and possibilities arise from the interactions and relationships between simpler entities. The emergent properties of complex systems, such as consciousness in humans, can be seen as a manifestation of relational power at a high level of complexity.

- ChatGPT as guided by Jay McDaniel

Ten Things to Keep in Mind
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Three Dimensions of Relational Power: Relational power involves three foundational dimensions: active, intentional openness; a self-creative response to what is received in a spirit of openness; and a commitment to enriching the world through nurturing mutual relationships. In these three ways, relational power is unlike unilateral power, which is characterized by domination, self-serving creativity, and indifference towards reciprocal connections.

Collective and Individual Exercise of Relational Power: This form of power is applicable both at individual and group levels, including families, neighborhoods, towns, cities, and nations. These entities can adopt a relational stance both internally and in their dealings with other communities,

Broad Application of Relational Power: Relational power has wide-ranging applications in interpersonal relationships, workplace dynamics, family life, education, political involvement, global diplomacy, etc. (See above.)

Relational Power and Earth Stewardship: Engaging with the Earth relationally helps us see it as a living, breathing community we're a part of, prompting sustainable practices in agriculture, transportation, material design, and energy that align with the Earth's natural systems.

Relational Power and Animal Respect: Extending relational power to our interactions with animals means recognizing their unique capacities and wisdom, responding with kindness and compassion, and acknowledging our shared life.

Theology and Relational Power: Theologically, relational power can reflect the divine nature, showcasing God's relational essence or conceptualizing God as the very embodiment of relational power, a view explored within process-relational theologies.

Health Advantages of Relational Power: Adopting relational power can lead to numerous health benefits, including improved mental and physical health, reduced stress, enhanced emotional support, increased personal efficacy, healthier lifestyle choices, improved cognitive functions, and better recovery from illness, benefitting both individuals and groups.

Leadership and Relational Power: Transcending political and religious boundaries, relational power is essential for empathetic and effective leadership, characterized by policies and personal character that reflect relational values.

Foundational to Ecological Civilization: The vision for an ecological civilization, which represents our best hope for a sustainable future, is based on prioritizing relational over unilateral power, encouraging a global shift towards a more interconnected and compassionate society.

Metaphysical Perspective on Relational Power: Metaphysically, relational power is supported by perspectives viewing life and the universe as interdependent networks of mutual becoming, a view rooted in process-relational philosophies that emphasize the intrinsic value and interconnected existence of all entities, highlighting the critical importance of interconnectedness and mutual respect in the fabric of life.

​- Jay McDaniel